A young woman, just a few weeks past her 18th birthday, awaits the birth of a longed-for honeymoon-conceived baby.
She was my mama, and that baby was me.
My sweet mama lived to see my 3rd birthday before her time on this earth was cut short by a reckless driver.
I don't remember her apart from two fleeting mind pictures. There's no-one to tell me about her. I can only imagine. But I'm sure she had marvelous hopes and dreams for my life while she waited out her final months that long hot summer of ’59, rounding her teenage hands over a tummy stretched tight and imagining good things to come.
As a young mother of 18 myself, I was in awe of a newborn son cradled in my arms one early March morning. The emotions were indescribable and as he snuggled close, I imagined my own hopes and dreams for his life.
Some came to pass and others were nothing like I imagined, because life is never really as we would have written the story is it?
Yesterday I sat with my Bible open at Psalm 139 and let the words sink deeply into my thoughts. I was struck by the vast difference between an earthly parent and a Heavenly Father; the limited dreams of my human desires, and the eternal knowing of an omnipotent God.
Whilst my mother dreamed of what my life would be like, and I imagined the path my son would follow through the years, God KNEW before any of us were conceived exactly who we were, what we would be become, and how the story of our life would be written.
So I woke on Friday morning to another birthday, and for the very first time I imagined my mother cradling me in her strong young arms and the love that coursed through her excited heart. The vision was overwhelming and I spent most of the morning wiping away salty tears as they would intermittently escape without my permission.
But they were good tears because the more they fell the deeper I felt God's love for me.
I knew that HE KNEW.
Every loss, every pain, every sorrow, every disappointment, every betrayal...HE KNEW before I was born.
Every joy, triumph, delight, commitment...HE KNEW.
Because unlike earthly parents who imagine the lives our children will grow into, HE KNEW my life and your life before we were formed in the womb.
And that is comfort beyond measure. Nothing is a surprise to Him and before I face any joy or sorrow HE IS THERE waiting to lift me high, or hold me tight. He is never not there.
I'm the one who forgets Him.
So I'm going to let this truth soak deeper into my spirit as I open the gate on another year in this temporary life, and be mindful that He KNEW and no matter what I face, He's already there.
My friend, that same Father KNOWS you too.
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