Friday, May 25, 2018

Planting and reaping...

I have to say, being out house hunting each weekend for the last month has left me falling behind in the every day responsibilities of homemaking. Fortunately my beloved does not mind, he's more concerned with whether or not I'm looking after myself. 

Last Sunday night after a particularly full two days of open house inspections, meetings with a builder and looking far and wide for suitable land we might decide to build on, he announced we were going to relax with a nice sunset meal overlooking the ocean....and I did not protest. 

Continuing to live a healthy grain, dairy and refined sugar free diet meant we needed to scan the menu very carefully for suitable choices (though Mr E still has grains sometimes) but there were some good options. Not realising just how hungry I was, a plate of chicken, avocado and macadamia salad was devoured rather swiftly, and Mr E certainly made quick work of the steak, chips and salad on his plate too. 

It was a lovely end to a big weekend and once again I was reminded just how cherished I am by my husband. As I drifted off to sleep later that night this scripture came to mind...

"He who sows sparingly will also reap sparingly, and he who sows bountifully will also reap bountifully." (2 Corinthians 9:6)
Or as most of us have heard at some point in life, you reap what you sow. 

My husband treats me with love and respect because that's how I treat him. He is honest with me because I am honest with him. He cares about my health because I care about his. He sits and listens to me because I listen to him (though as a woman I talk way more than him so he really does go the extra mile with that). He is generous with me because I am generous with him.
We both sow goodness into each other's lives and that's exactly what we reap in return.

But it wasn't always that way. 

I came into our marriage 'damaged' emotionally and wanted to be the boss, to have control of everything, to feel empowered and strong...but I did not consider how this would affect my gentle man. 
Not one to argue, he let me walk all over our marriage, graciously and patiently allowing me the time I needed (many years in fact) to feel secure in our relationship and to rest in his genuine love for me and lifelong commitment to me.

Then one day I had an epiphany and everything changed. The seeds of love and kindness and patience and compassion he had been planting into our marriage began to bloom, and bloom abundantly. My eyes were opened and all I wanted to do was let this precious man lead us because I knew I could trust him with my whole life, for my whole life.

Fortunately our dear Blossom was still young at the time so teaching her to be a woman of grace and kindness, respectful and loving towards her daddy, was the example I decided to show day by day - not with fanfare or falsehood, but with a genuinely full and giving heart. 

Blossom is 24 tomorrow and this week we have talked often about her growing up years.
There have been many joyful memories, sad ones too, but there's also been words of life and encouragement shared between us.

She opened up about the deep respect she has for me as a wife, for how I cling to Jesus no matter what, and she shared how this has been the model for her own relational choices in how she treats Ross. Blossom admitted she is still a work in progress but notices big changes when she chooses to walk in love and plant seeds of goodness.

My dear daughter knows of my past failings because I was very transparent with her about them during long conversations from her mid teens to early adulthood, and indeed she knows of the failings I am still working towards overcoming right now. But what resonates with her is the willingness in my heart to grow from my mistakes and take responsibility for them, my repentance and swiftness in running to Jesus, and my humanity in repeating the same mistake a few times before finally getting it right.

I'm an imperfect woman who is still learning to refine her attitudes to reflect the goodness I so deeply desire to have as a wife, and my dear daughter has no illusions about my struggles because I do not hide them.

How much easier it is to instruct our children when we are honest about our struggles. Doing this we level the playing field by acknowledging we are imperfect, sinners one and all, each one a product of this broken world yet saved by the blood of Jesus. 

Every relationship seed that is planted must be nourished and watered, tended lovingly, and generously given time to grow. My husband did that for me. 
The harvest from his faithfulness came to fruition many years after our wedding, and that harvest brought forth a sowing of new seeds in my own life.
Now that crop is being harvested in my daughter's life and she will take seeds from it to sow into her own family, seeds which one day her two daughters will hopefully harvest.

Blossom used to say. "I want to grow up and be a mummy like you" and I would tell her, "Grow up and be a better mummy than me. Take from my life what is good and use it; take what was not good and let that go." Like sifting the chaff from the wheat.

She's going to teach that same lesson to Cully May and Rafaella too.

Sowing and reaping, the cycle of life.



Petra Baker said...

Hi Jenny, I’ve been away lately from Facebook as I’m facing up to dealing with mild depression. Reading this makes me realize that I have missed reading your posts. They are truly encouraging and inspirational. Hope you continue all the good you are doing for your loved ones and looking after yourself too. Sending you hugs πŸ€—Petra

Allie-oops Designs said...

Oh sweetie house hunting is exhausting!!! You are ever my inspiration dear heart, may God continue to bless your marriage and life. Love you so much.

Robin in New Jersey said...

Thank you for sharing with us, Jenny. You are indeed a Titus 2 woman and I am thankful for you!

april dawn said...


Lin said...

Beautiful Jenny - thank you. xx

sillyheart said...

Wonderful words! Thanks Jenny!!!

Kim said...

Wise words once again. Thank you. And the handiwork is gorgeous.

Tammy Lyons said...

Thank you so much for your words of wisdom. Love to read your posts. Always makes me inspire to be a much better person and better wife and mother. Don't forget to take care of you Jenny. This home is gonna happen very very soon. You should get good news any day now on a home that is perfect for you.

Susan said...

How true your words are, Jenny, and the beauty of living this way is that each generation grows closer to Jesus by following this path. Thank you for the kindness and wisdom and transparency you show, not only to your daughter, but to all your readers, too. You are teaching us every day that we can start over, try again, repent as needed, move forward. You are teaching us that we are worth saving, when sometimes we don't think we are, and you teach how to do it. I don't remember when I first found your blog, but I'm glad I've been able to grow some with you through those years. May the Lord bless you and keep you.

Brenda said...

Hello Jenny; You are so gifted in sharing your life and how you learn and grow from the love of your family and from your love of the Lord and the spectacular place he takes in your life every day. I felt somewhat stronger today from reading your post and knowing that every one does have struggles in life, it is how we deal with them and learn from them that makes us stand stronger in our every day lives with our strength we gain from the Lord. Thank you so much for sharing Jenny. My prayers are always including you and your famlily. Have a great and glorious success when the time is right for the perfect place to buy.

Joyce said...

I love reading your posts Jenny. They are always uplifting and encouraging. A few years ago I was very ill. My wonderful husband cared for me without one word of complaint. Now that he is ill, I look back on those days when I wasn’t able to do even the simplest of tasks for myself, and I treat him with the same love and patience he showed me. Life is often difficult but I know I can turn to Jesus and pray for help. He always delivers.

Karen said...

Beautiful Jenny! Thanks!

Margie West said...

O am so thankful I found you Jenny! Margie/NY

Darlene Connon said...

I'm so happy,I came across you're blog. you're words are such an inspiration to me. Thank you so much.

Martha Roberts said...

Thank you, Jenny, for wise and honest words. I love my husband dearly and I know he loves me. That doesn't mean we do not have disagreements or cross words sometimes but we have been married over 45 years and we have gone through the HUGE adjustment of his retirement. I am thankful for him every day.

Jenny said...

I'm catching up on blogs after being gone for two whole is glorious to have a break from responsibilities & only have my sweet husband to enjoy. We eat no/low carb when& eating out can be a challenge. We've learned most burger places cannot make a good salad. We also have learned that eggs (omelets!) are a great option. Hamburger steaks with a salad are also very good. Our last meal out we stopped at a little diner in a small downtown. The building was very run down but had great reviews. I ordered hamburger steak, side salad & hand-sliced chips. I cut my burger up & tossed it in my was delicious. I think their dressing was made fresh. And my chips were sliced fresh & fried while I yummy.

Husband's are one of God's dearest creations. The best marriage is two broken people trying to be like Jesus. It is a lifelong learning & growing. Thankfully, we don't have to reach perfection to reap the rewards of infesting in each other. Then it becomes even more beautiful when you see your children infest in their families as well.

KingsailK said...

Thanks Jenny!!I savour your b l og!I really do!!😊God is So Goodxx