Hospitality...

Every four or five weeks I visit my dear friend Rosie to chat, sit and and stitch.

We arrange a time for my arrival and she will be there waiting with the gates wide open for me to drive up between the tall trees and lush greenery and park in her yard, right near the fish pond and her colourful array of various succulents and more lovely trees.

We hug and head inside, our chatter already begun, and Rosie brews fresh coffee while I settle at the table. It's already set with a pretty vintage cloth, china plates, sugar bowl and something wonderfully sweet. The atmosphere of 'welcome' is tangible, lifting my spirit instantly, regardless of the concerns I may have walked in with.

Rosie's art for hospitality is one my Nana found to be quite natural, and as a young mother with many children I too found it easy and enjoyable to open my home for other mums to come visit. Baking has always been a joy and sharing treats with my friends, especially those who were not keen cooks, put a smile on every face. 

(the tea towels above were a gift from my lovely friend Margaret)

In our homeschooling years, even with teenagers, hospitality was again very easy as we had a network of other homeschool families who took turns hosting morning teas or a weekend BBQ and at every home a sense of welcome and hospitality filled the air.

In 2009 with our youngest children now mid to late teens we moved to the other other side of the country and no longer had people to visit or friends to invite over. My husband was teaching at a remote boarding school and I took a part-time position as teachers aide in the home economics department.

We lived in a small house on the school grounds and I very quickly discovered a number of the students knocking on my sewing room door each weekend asking, "Miss, can you help me put this together?" or "Miss, I can't do this stitch. Will you show me how?" Being a small boarding school and us living on campus I built a kind of 'auntie' relationship rather quickly with a few of the female students and enjoyed the extra hours helping them hone various sewing skills. In fact, I had to learn a few things myself just hours before instructing the girls - like inserting zippers, a ladder stitch closure for stuffed bear limbs, and using an Overlocker. 

Over time a few would stay for afternoon tea or even lunch and I realised this was a new form of hospitality I was experiencing. We'd often rummage through my craft or fabric scraps and I'd send them back to the dorm with bits and pieces to practice on or add to a term project. The nicest thing though, was seeing the joy and relaxation they felt in our home, and the laughter we shared over biscuits, fabric, ginger beer and threads.

A year later we moved off campus and into what I will always consider the 'house of my dreams', though we only lived there for 18 months.

The students could no longer visit but I did see them in class for the next year or so as I continued my teacher's aide duties and it was always a wonderful time spent in their company and encouraging them to create.

At the end of 2011, with just one child left at home who was in need of employment, hubby moved the three of us to a larger town and we left the school. Soon I had a small stitching group regularly meeting at home and about a year or so after that we began taking turns to host the fortnightly gatherings. 

How lovely it was to be welcomed into each nest!

Spending time with friends, having them open their home and make you a cup of tea, serve you a delicious lunch and put you at ease. There was much chatter and laughter, everyone showing what they were making and ideas bantering back and forth. When it came time to leave there was joy to spare in every smile as we planned the next get together before climbing into our cars and driving off in all directions. 

Over time for one reason or another our group drifted away and it became just Rosie and I, which is where we're at today. But that's the cycle of life, isn't it. 

free pattern here in my shop

Can you see the flow of seasons in my life?

Hospitality is like that. 

As we age, move to a new town, take on new interests or occupations, no longer have children to care for, adjust to health restrictions or different housing, the opportunities to show hospitality may also change.  

In fact there might be seasons when you're unable to open your home and may well find this to be a God given season of rest from serving others. Many of us can wear ourselves out from doing more than we should, and if you are recovering from an illness this is indeed a time to step back and give your health the time it needs for restoration. It's important in a quiet season to show grace to yourself and let that rest time run it's course for you will be better able to resume a life of hospitality later on.

Over the past year or two I have had less time than ever to extend the hand of friendship within my home, and it bothered me, a lot, but it was through this season the Lord taught me that life is a series of ebbing and flowing, like a tide coming in and then receding until the next cycle. Things do not stay the same, and friends often come and go. The important thing is to keep a hospitable heart for when it's needed again.

So I stopped feeling bad about the lack of faces within my home and instead chose to give myself more fully to sharing through my blog the joys of living this gentle domestic life, and to reach out into the Gentle Domesticity group I'd started the year before as an online sewing group to see if there were any members who wanted to more fully participate in the discussion and sharing of homemaker ideals and everything that entails. 

Visit the group here.

The response was overwhelming and today the gentle ladies in our group have become very dear to me as I grow to know them and their lives more and more. 

These women 'invite' each member to share a glimpse of their day to day lives with all it's triumphs, trials, laughter and tears. Through the reality of living where they are, in the circumstances they find themselves in, with abundance or lack or somewhere in between, each of us is growing into a better version of ourselves. 

Hospitality is evident in that group every morning when I open my web browser to meet them across our virtual kitchen table. It overflows with encouragement, compassion, kindness and fun - exactly what we all hope for in face to face friendships, but not so easy to find with people you've never met and most likely never will. Yet, it has happened and some members have spoken out about the unusually hospitable and respectful attitude flowing through every person and post. 

But let us not forget hospitality towards those who dwell under our roof, too, for they are most important of all. 

I have been in homes where a wife can make her husband feel most unwelcome, as though he is in her way...and yet she will heap care and concern upon her guests, running here and there to fill their tea cup or offer more cake. This always makes me cringe and wishing I could leave immediately, so I try to speak kindly to the husband and ask questions about his work or hobbies as it is his home as well that I am visiting and I do appreciate the hospitality of being invited there.

Hospitality, it seems, can be shown in many ways and I'm eager to see what else the Lord would teach me about it this year - whether that be having new friends come for a visit, starting a stitching group or Bible study at home, teaching young ones new skills, contributing more to the online gentle domesticity group, preparing a welcoming and comfortable room for overnight guests or family, sharing coffee with a neighbour or welcoming my husband home after a long day at work with a hearty meal, an ear to listen and a loving smile.

Hospitality is an art form, a gentle and warm expression of care for the comfort of an other within the boundaries of your life, wherever that may be.

Some things I'd like to do this year in preparation for opportunities to show hospitality are :

* bake extra meals and sweets to freeze for times when there's nothing fresh on hand and someone arrives unexpectedly

* embroider or applique a set of pretty pillowcases for the spare bedroom

* make a few pretty hand towels for the guest bathroom (see the top photo for my first one)

* make a supply of simple hand made gifts or jams which I can take with me when visiting friends

* collect tea cups, cake plates and water jugs for serving a gathering of new friends around the table

* make a couple of pretty table cloths and more trimmed kitchen and serving cloths

* decorate the spare bedroom and remove all the clutter as it's become our storage space at the moment

I shall work through each idea as I am able and be joyful in doing so, all the while keeping my heart open to God's prompts for other ways of being hospitable that I've not thought of yet.

It seems hospitality was much more than I ever imagined.

How do you show hospitality?

hugs

The Gentle Domestic Life and a BOM in 2018...

I first began my earnest journey towards gentle domestic living around the middle of 2014 after a few years of being unsettled within myself, feeling I’d somehow lost part of my identity when the children grew up and left home.

In 2015 I shared the idea of following ‘a year of gentle domesticity’ on my blog, suggesting others might like to revive the gentle and oft-forgotten arts of embracing home-life and all this entails. A loud cry was heard from all corners of the globe, women everywhere were hungry to have their home-centred-hearts refreshed and validated. I was stunned at the response for I had imagined this was perhaps my own crisis, a journey for one. Yet, beautiful notes and comments flowed forth about a similar longing.

It seemed that for too long the simple and precious delight of being a homemaker had been made to appear trite and lowly, yet I believed the woman who loves her home and family and finds joy in the everyday living of a domestic life had value far beyond measure.

Walking this path over the last few years I have come to appreciate that you never quite ‘get there’. Intentionally living a gentle domestic life is a morning by morning choice and the fruit of our labours may not be evident for weeks, months or perhaps years – but it’s always worth the effort.

As the months pass by the softness of a grateful and gracious heart begins to shine and others will notice. A new depth of appreciation for the people in our lives and what we’ve been blessed to have will richly increase our capacity for kindness, compassion, love and generosity.

We discover new skills, return to old ones, and along the way find more women who share a desire to ‘feather their nests’ and create a wonderful home sanctuary where crossing the doorstep is always accompanied by a sense of belonging, hospitality and welcome.

Living the gentle domestic life is not solely for the woman who spends each day at home, it’s for all women who embrace homemaking, whether they work at outside employment, are caregivers for relatives, volunteer a few days a week, work beside their husband on the farm, or like me are working from a home office.

The heart of a homemaker is ‘for’ her family and home, no matter her circumstances.

One example - for the busy working mother a simple act of throwing a fresh tablecloth over the dinner table and popping a few flowers from the garden into a glass jar between the salt and pepper shaker suddenly causes her heart to swell with satisfaction and the meal of BBQ chicken and salad from the supermarket suddenly doesn’t seem so bad because she’s changed the atmosphere of the meal and made the place where it’s going to be eaten one of warmth and care where the family can laugh and share about their day.

It’s really about doing what you can in the time you have with a gentle homemaker spirit.

Next year we shall once again celebrate this wonderful vocation of gentle domesticity through my blog and in the Gentle Domesticity Facebook group.

Join me in 2018 for a year of discovering what our homes reflect about our hearts and how to nourish the atmosphere in ways that will bring blessing and joy and comfort to any who pass over its threshold and also to our own lives.

Personally I shall be confronting the hangover of over-consumption within our home, budget and personal purchases by choosing to live on less, using what we have first and learning new skills which I hope will be useful now and into the future. I have no high expectations to put upon my efforts, just a willing heart to embrace the small things that matter and remove the things that don’t.

I was raised by my Nana and Pop in a tiny one bedroom walk-through with outside bathroom and flower strewn front garden barely the size of a bathtub, so I’ll be drawing much of my own inspiration from the memories of that time, years where love was generously given, gentleness, laughter and gratitude were normal, hard work was accepted as everybody’s responsibility in life and housewives took pride in their homes whether modest or grand.

 I remember there wasn’t much money but my grandparents provided well through the industry of their combined creative skills, but many of those skills I never bothered to learn or have long forgotten...for now. After all, it’s never too late to learn and life really can be an adventure.

Shall we journey this gentle domestic year together?

My friend Fee will join us in 2018 and share some wonderful homemaker ideas on her blog, so between us we hope to cover many different aspects of the gentle domestic life to encourage you and to encourage each other.

Through the month of December I'm offering the original Gentle Domesticity pattern as a free gift which you can download here from my shop.

It would be perfect as the cover of a homemaker's binder, stitched onto a vintage linen or framed as I did with the blue version...

In 2018 I will also be offering a free Block of the Month.

The twelve designs were originally offered through my Stitchery Club a couple of years ago and by the end of next year you'll be able to piece them together as a quilt.

"A Year in the Garden" will kick off January 1st and I can't wait! 

So there you have it, 2018 will be all about home, family and the garden.

I do hope you'll join in the fun!

hugs

The wonderful wet...

After four long years of drought where I live in the tropics of Northern Australia the rains came. It began on the weekend and is still raining. Glory be, this is a blessing and could mean we'll have a proper wet season this coming summer after all. 

Funny thing though, I'm so used to it being perpetually sunny and clear now that I had forgotten about endless days of rain and the need to get washing dry. In the old house the clothesline was under cover but not so in this new home, which meant after spending the morning at Blossom's yesterday I needed to drop in to KMart and purchase a simple drying rack to place on the verandah. 

Lucky me, I got the last one! Seems there's been a rush on them this week.

It doesn't hold a lot but there's only the two of us at home now, though I'll need to use the dryer (after sweeping away the cobwebs) for sheets if I can't get a sunny day in between the wet ones.

I change sheets every 4 days as they tend to 'wilt' in our hot and humid climate. Besides, there's nothing quite like slipping between crisp, clean cotton sheets, dried on the clothesline and smelling of fresh air and sunshine.

The rain has also brought cooler weather, days of around 27 C (80 F) and nights a refreshing 21 C (70 F). Those sort of temps lead me to cook comfort foods like chicken pot pie, lamb and vegetable soup, Banana Parkinson and Anzac cookies.

Mr E loves chicken pot pie...

...and I love soup and fresh baked bread.

The Banana Parkinson was for Blossom because it's a long time favourite of hers, and the Anzacs for my darling hubby who likes them crisp and thin. 

There's a little story about the Banana Parkinson. Originally it was a recipe I found in an old cookbook many years ago called Banana Parkin. 

My maiden name is Parkinson so right then and there, once we'd baked and tasted that it was delicious, it was renamed in honour of my paternal family. 

Both it and the Anzacs are packed with healthy oats, an ingredient we all love.

Sophie is also loving the cooler weather, snuggling up to Cully May's stuffed ballerina mouse on the spare bed during the day, and snuggling up to Mr E and I in our bed at night. 

What a life.

On Monday evening Mr E arrived home from work with a bunch of flowers, my first in the new home! I felt so cherished, not realising how much I needed the boost. The previous 24 hours had been taken up with doubts as to whether I should continue the Gentle Domesticity Facebook group or close it down and he'd picked up on my sombre mood without asking any questions, bless him. 

If you're a member of the group you will know that out of that big question I asked on Sunday afternoon came something so lovely, and so caring. A real community of women who love home, family, sewing, and living a gentle domestic life, gathered together and began to share about their lives. 

I tell you, the chatter hasn't stopped since! What precious ladies they are, all ages and walks in life, having a variety of talents and experiences, reaching out to each other, knowing they are being accepted and not judged. They have even started a stitch-a-long and a few good artisan bread recipes have surfaced too. 

A sweet bonus for me is that it's not about the members waiting to hear from me anymore, which was never my intention but apparently I hadn't made that clear (message to self - be clear about the purpose of such a group), it's now flowing beautifully from their own input. 

And you know what? My dear daughter, Blossom (Elizabeth) is joining me as an Admin for the group so we'll be hearing more about her gentle domestic life too. That blesses this proud mama! 

If you'd like to join, or if you're already a member but have missed out on the doings of the past few days and want to catch up visit the Gentle Domesticity Group here. 

...SEWING...

I've missed sewing on rainy days so am thoroughly enjoying the pitter pattern of rain on the roof as I ply my trade with needle and thread.

Over the weekend I finished another block from Jen Kingwell's "Pollen" table runner pattern. There are five blocks and I'm planning to do one each weekend so another three weeks and I can begin the quilting and finishing, which means I could have it done early to mid November at this rate. 

Block 2 prepared.

Blocks 1 and 2 completed.

It's been a while since my last Scripture stitchery, but I do wait for inspiration and don't rush those things. Recently this design for Galatians 6:9 flowed from my pencil early one morn and is now almost finished, just the wording to do...

As well as that I have been stitching new Christmas patterns for the November issue of The Stitchery Club.

I'll show you one of them today and the other four next time. This one was designed to be displayed inside a hoop...

...and can be stitched any year by simply changing the date. 

The theme for this year's Christmas designs are a star. In each one you'll find a star somewhere, reminding me of one special star high in the night sky which signaled the birth of Jesus over two thousand years ago. 

"Star of wonder, star of light, star of royal beauty bright..." I love that carol.

Would you like the recipe for Banana Parkinson?

Let me know and if you do I'll prepare it as a recipe sheet for your Living the Gentle Domestic Life Cookbook folder. 

I'd best be off now, having avoided the mopping of my vast hardwood floors for long enough. Sigh. 

Is there a chore you dislike or try to avoid? Blossom tells me hers is washing the dishes (which I love) and mine is mopping floors (which she loves). 

If only we still lived around the corner from each other we could swap those chores and both be cheered.

I'll leave you today with a photo of Cully May exploring her backyard after a rain storm. 

Why don't you and I take some time to stir up a childlike wonder for the simple things in our lives.

 It would be good for the soul, yes?

hugs